Spiritual Warfare

Spiritual warfare is something that isn't really talked about very often in the church. It is a subject I feel that people often avoid discussing at times? The thing is though, it is so real. It's happening all around us, every single day of our lives. Spiritual warfare is commonly thought of as God and Satan fighting one another, but this isn't the case at all. It actually has a lot to do with us. Satan's goal is to intervene in our faith in God. He wants to pull us away from the Almighty God. He wants us to doubt our Heavenly Father. He wants us to disobey the Creator of the Universe. It's crazy. I have dealt with spiritual warfare before such as around the time I go to church camp and afterward when I come home, but it was especially present when I was in Haiti for a mission trip. It's just so heavy, and it wore me out. However, I got through it and ended up much stronger than before. The thing is though, I literally can't compare this experience in Thailand to anything I've experienced in my entire life. The weight I feel and the extreme heaviness that is seemingly dragging me down everyday is hard to cope with. I've never felt such a constant weight like this, and I definitely didn't realize it would be this heavy. I think that because of all the insane opportunities I've had to share God's word already, Satan is attacking me at full force. I have to admit, the past few weeks have truly been the hardest of my life. I've fought a lot of things I never thought I'd get back into or have to worry about again. I've fought so many negative thoughts and just trying to understand why the heck I'm here. I am reminded though that God put me here for a reason. I'm already doing His work, and Satan just really doesn't like that. I literally feel like I'm hit by a truck with the warfare after having a really good opportunity to talk about Jesus. The other day I had the opportunity to share my beliefs and views on a lot of subjects pertaining to Christianity with the exchange students from my district, and there were lots of questions and curiosity. Though they may have literally all disagreed with me, there was a chance for them to hear me out and what I believe. I made sure they knew I'd love to answer any questions or if I didn't have an answer, I would find out with the best of my abilities. It was really really really rough though.. it's defeating. It's also encouraging at the same time though that there was curiosity. Now they know that they can come to me if they're ever wanting to hear more. It's come up twice I believe, and I always try and share respectfully even when people are kind of.. harsh. I can't even count how many times since I've been here that I've had such clear opportunities to talk about God. I've had soo many opportunities placed right in front of my face here, in a Buddhist country, than what I ever did in the US for months combined, easily. I've only been here a month and two days. God is working so much already !! Okay so anyways, coming back to the convo with the exchange students, that same day I was with two other exchange students at my school hangin' out. A sports teacher (American) we talk to a lot came in the room looking for computer parts or something. We were just having a regular conversation, and it somehow led to talking about religion and ours beliefs for literally almost an hour. Satan hated this so much. Two huge opportunities in one day?! So, that night, I was basically punched in the face by satan's lies, and he was just trying so hard to weaken my growing faith. My faith has gotten so much stronger as I've been here, but I've never been so tested in my faith at the same time. I feel that these are the times we grow spiritually the most. When we're persecuted. I feel like the entire country is against me, and it feels sucky sometimes. It's difficult to remember sometimes that God is using me and continues to. When I get back on my feet finally, I just get knocked right back down it feels like. When people say spiritual warfare isn't even a thing it boils my blood a bit not going to lie !! I literally can't describe the feeling I've felt these few weeks being here. I believe that it won't really get better, but I know that the more I turn to God for refuge and keep my focus on Him and not what Satan is trying to do, I will feel the weight lifted off of me. It's a hard task though. Once you get down it's easy to stay down and stay in that mindset. So so easy. I can be stuck in it for days or even a week at a time. Some days I want to try so hard and others I just want to give up with giving these problems I have to God. It's easy to just try and deal with it on your own. I still struggle with giving it to God every single day. I just want people to be aware that spiritual warfare really happens. It. Is. Real. God has given me so opportunities in conversations to share about Him, and I have taken them. They may think I'm stupid and what I believe is all bull crap, but God may be working in their hearts as I speak. It's hard being a Christian, and God never once said it'd be an easy joyride. Persecution is talked about in multiple parts in the Bible. Matthew 5:10. 1 Peter 3:14. 2 Timothy 3:12. Luke 6:22. 1 John 3:13. John 15:19. Okay I could go on for like 20 more verses, but you get the point. It's mentioned sooo many times. For the Lord's glory, this persecution is so worth it. It's hard to accept this at times, and it sounds weird to be like glad you're being persecuted, but it is for His glory. All in all though, after a month of being here, I know God has placed me in a perfect position to do His work that we're called to do. I'm not going to sugar code this, but it has been the hardest month of my life no doubt. However, so so much good comes out of trials like this. It's hard to see sometimes for sure, and I still struggle seeing it sometimes. He is really moving here in Thailand though no doubt about it. I'm seriously honored to be apart of it and that He's using me. If you'd like to pray for me just pray that I can continue to block Satan out and really turn to God when I'm struggling with the thoughts Satan is putting in my mind to get me down and weaken my faith. It's so easy to get down and just continue to let it happen. I'm struggling with this still, but I'm working on it. Thank you for reading and for the prayers! -Kalynn